Resounding Silence : July 2011

Thursday, July 28, 2011

economist and anthropologist to be ..

Me:Hi everyone,my name is Rosa. i'm from Malaysia,Sabah.
Tutor: They don't know where Sabah is. Geography is important. Could you explain where Sabah is?
Me: Owh, sorry.. Sabah is one of the state in West Malaysia, it is popularly called as Borneo,the land below the wind..(promote skit)..:)
i'm doing Bach.of Arts,my background in economic is,i've done Micro last semester,and did my econs in Year 12.
Tutor: In M'sia?
Me:~yess..(yes,hope you didn't misunderstood.coz if i told you i took AUSMAT,you probably didn't know what's that).
something bout me? urm..i play guitar.. :)
five years from now, i hope that i've finish my degree,working for my government and became a lecturer. :)
Tutor: wonderful!!(clap,clap!) do you want to be like me?? ahh,finally i found someone who had same interest like me..
Me: (smilee)

well you see, that is what actually happen during my first week of second sem in Macro tutorial. The brief intro session that my tutor asked us to do, tell me more about my tutemate,indeed all of them had interesting stories and background!. and what an encouraging moment when my tutor said that "i am happy you would like to work with government and also do teaching.well,its good!i know it is. cuz i've been doing that for 21years!plus you could earn more salary!"~ and my response is...its mainly because 1. my responsibility to work with government. 2. my passion :)
listening to his own background in economics astound me more. He is more than what it takes to look at him. *he looks genius* hha..
anyway,he told us that he has been living in 7 different countries and 15 states all his life. and he's not a person who gets culture shock easily. :) i smiled for that statement. as i reflect my self for that moment,i am not that kind of person too. but when i recall the journey of my ownself,i realised that i am wrong. Last two years when i continued my study at KBU for foundation,i actually caught into the 'culture shock' confusion during my first two months there. but the feeling gradually dissapear as i get to know more people and start socialising more. *socialising skills is very important.*
there are times that you are afraid to approach people. cuz you are afraid of rejection *tidak kena layan*
but why not give it a try. people are different from each other. the way they approach people may be different as in their culture or the normality they had are different from us. but one thing for sure human is a social-able living. we live by socialising with each other. we need human contact. imagine if we are the only person in this world. that must be lonesome. imagine if we are all alone in the uni. that must be frustrating.

first sem teach me alot. they've change me and they've stimulate a new understanding about things around me.
its not simple. its complex. unexplainable.
one word. GRATITUDE.
yup,second sem offers me so many hopes. hopes to exploit more what uni life could offer me.
i've decided majoring in economics. and do development study. but anthropology caught my attention during the first lecture in my first week of second sem!
awesome. i've heard somewhere that anthro is quite difficult subject. that is why i tried to put away the subject the moment i started my first sem. less i know that it is actually interesting!
indeed i've seen and i've heard about anthropology since i was in my highschool. hoping someday i could actually study this course. and here i am! taking anthropology! :)

2 intro question in the reading materials:
~why taking this subject?
cuz i found that it is interesting long ago. but never had a chance to know more. now when there is a chance,i better grab it.
~what do you thing anthropology could do?
as i learn more about the discipline of anthropology, i hope that i would be able to applied it not only in my everyday life but in the future where it is needed.

economics on the other hand, has been my fav subject since foundation. i admit that i don't know what is it all about. but it is so frustrating when i don't understand what the newspaper says about interest rates,monetary policy,global recession,saying that it'll impact our everyday life. it is so frustrating when i don't understand why the graphs looks like that..and because of that,i hope that when i learn about economics, not only i am able to understand what are they talking about the economics of the world, but is able to apply what i've learn into something useful for my country..Sabah precisely.it would be wonderful if i could actually interpret the data displayed and do my own assumption and models and theories.

today my lecturer said,
"if you want to be a professional economist,you need to read a lot of good books" just like what Mr. Wong had said to me during foundation.
Now everything makes senses.
I should not be afraid of making mistakes. I am a student. Mistakes is a complement to me where we exist together. Not a substitute. But eventually, i'll learn on how to make the best out of it. :)
in the mean time, i want to enjoy my learning here!
thanks God for everything! :)

Sunday, July 24, 2011

second semester!!

hoorayyy!! finally second semester is starting already.
today i went to church. meet the couples who always sit in front of me. have a chit-chat for a while before goin back. asking bout their holiday during winter. they've been to west coast of aussie. didn't really caught up which place they've been for the holiday. but sounds nice. they said it was raining most of the day but its nice they're able to sit and relax inside the cottage and read lotslotslots of books.. :D
how cute they are. may God bless them always..

and my holiday..? yes they're awesome.

and yes..holiday is over. press-on new sem! :)

this sem,i'm taking four subject.
Macro,Bus.stat,Dev.stdy,Chnse.
All iz well! :)

i'll do the best as i can!
and i need God to hang on here. :)

ok..in the meantime,adioss..!! :) <3

Friday, July 22, 2011

Matt Redman - This Is How We Know [Lyrics]

enjoy listening to this song. like it..:)

Thursday, July 21, 2011

ouhh yeah! out!

Good afternoon!
going out today with my friends. and i have no money at all. why??
coz, yesterday i went to atm machine to withdraw some money. and the atm said, your card has been damaged. please visit the nearest branch.!
gosh. then i went to the nearest bank..report the damaged. and guess what, i'll only get my card in four to five working days. ouchhh...:( see.. something happen.
but its okay. i got another alternative. thanks God!

hmm..i want to buy few excercise book for my second sem. yeah! :)))
ok deh. its time to go..
have a good day everyone! :)

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

when life give you a test..

~if what ahead of you scares you, and if what behind you hurt you, just look above, He never stop holding your life :)
~jangan Kuathir tentang apapun dlm hidupmu. adakah dengan kuathir akan menambah sehasta hidupmu ?

~enjoylah masa mudamu, tapi ingatlah semua itu akan diambil kira bila kita pulang kepada Bapa.

does this quote rings on your head sis ? :)

1 Corinthians 13

¹ If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. ² If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. ³ If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast,but do not have love, I gain nothing.

⁴ Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. ⁵ It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. ⁶ Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. ⁷ It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

⁸ Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. ⁹ For we know in part and we prophesy in part, ¹⁰ but when completeness comes, what is in part disappears.¹¹ When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me. ¹² For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.

¹³ And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

walk a life of love, and life will love you in return. but do not love this world as this is our only temporary home. :)

and always remember that you are special. remember that you are beautiful. remember that as children of God we are precious more than what we think we are.

hidup pasti rasa susah untuk kita jalani. tapi jangan susah hati. semua orang melalui hal yang sama. saya pun pernah rsa down yang teramat2 sampai dlm fkiran, alangkah baik jika hidupku diambil Tuhan saat ini.

family,study,kawan2,relationship~ semua rsa ada ja masalah. selalu rasa susah hati. rasa x mau sudah menghadapi. tapi saya lupa, hidup itu bukan terbatas sampai disana.

hidup sy berubah. bila saya sedar, tujuan sy hidup bukan untuk itu semua semata2. Kalau dulu sy pernah rasa happy bila bersama kawan2 seiman, pasti saja sekarang pun saya masih boleh rasa macam itu.

Saturday, July 16, 2011

you may not realise the day and time.
but i am sorry if i am gone when you start realising that i'll wait no more.
this has to be put to an end.
feel no regrets.
coz i am not.
and i am more than to say thank you.
sweet ending! :)

baebynylla

this name just remind me of something.
its been more than one month already.
its good to be able to put a smile on my heart again..

planning to change this name. but i like it as it sounds like vanilla. my fav flavour !!
give me vanilla ice cream, i'll stop sulking. haha~
but what to do, the memories wont go away. hmm.

but i know. memories is not meant to be forgotten. but to be cherished.
so i'll keep it! :)

able to move on, and give thanks

thanks God,
i may not be able to join the Ministry Youth Camp- MYC
i don't know what is Your plan for me. but i'll always put my faith on You.
i know i still got chance to get into fellowship with them on other occasion. maybe during the bible study at uni.
i'm so gonna join the MYC next year. :)

i also learn today that it is ok if i don't get everything i want. i usually wanted many things. i am not a demanding person but sometime i wish i had many things. but i realised that i may not get everything i wanted. that is the truth that i usually hard to accept, the truth that i always afraid to admit.
"God give me everything i needed instead of everything i wanted"
that is what i define everything had its own reason.

and i learn to confess my mistake. i did. and i am glad i did confess my mistake. and i am ashamed of it. and i'll try to change things i can. and the rest is up to God. i have limits that i can't do by my own.
"i can do everything in God who strengthen me"
is what i should always do.

and now i am able to move on.
"one step at time"
i know i can't do it without God who walk beside me all the time.
i know, it is never enough if we are trying to seek others acceptance and attention. but we will always feel contented if we really seek the Kingdom of God. for the water of life He has offered to us will never stop flowing.

thanks God.
i want to be a beautiful person in Your eyes.
i want to live a life of love.
and continuously lived filled with Your spirit.

Thursday, July 14, 2011

left 11days holiday ..

thanks God, exam is over, its quite tiring, very challenging, physically and mentally.
and thanks God i got the chance to have a holiday, a week away for Winter Trip.
and thanks God everything goes well from the first day until we came back few days ago, Tuesday precisely. :)

and its 11days left for my friends and i to spend our holiday before immersing ourselves to the continuous and repeating timetable of uni life. I'm not so sure what is so interesting studying abroad compared to studying in local country. But one thing that i could say here is, you wouldn't expect what would happen or what would you see or encounter on each new day of your life here. There's always something that surprised you. And you will always feel scared and worried what would happen tomorrow. I don't know if i'm the only one who felt that. But that is what i honestly feel.
Everyday seems to be different. And being alone makes things a bit hard for me. Alone not in the sense of totally having no friend. I mean, i feel alone coz i don't have any close friend who had the same course with me. I wish i had one,it would be easier for me to discuss about my study. Hm..maybe this is just one of the challenges that i had to face here. To find a way to make friends and put down all the walls around me, and just go and let myself free, to talk and engaged with new people and make new friends. To throw away all the low self-esteemed. I don't know why, its seems like i am not who i am this past few months since i arrive here. One moment i feel like i could conquer the world and one moment i feel like at the bottom of this world~terkapai2 tanpa hala tuju.

But i know, i will never give up. God had bring me to this, He must bring me through this. That is my faith. I may not know much about what will happen, but to trust everything in God's hand is my only hope.

My Evangelical Student groups had invited me to join the Ministry Youth Camp-a must go event of the year for the Christian uni student,i really want to join them, really want to join this camp, especially to learn more about Galatians and also do bible study with my brothers and sisters in Christ. I am not sure how am i going to join this camp. I prayed that God would sent someone to help me. Even though my financial is not that stable right now after the Winter Trip. I did planned my budget. All goes well. But i'm afraid something will come up, like paying hidden bills or expenses, that will over my budget. God help me so that i'll have wisdom to do my budget and plan my expenses.

and I pray so that God will make a way for me to join this camp. In Jesus name, I pray, Amen.

what else to talk about ?
hmm.. things aren't going the way i expected. But i know that i should always ready to expect the unexpected.
but i'll be okay i guess..
I feel like wanting to pour out what i feel here but i know i'll end up writing nonsense entry. haha :)
hmphh.. anyway.. i'm looking forward to plan for my next sem. I am so going to improve in my study.

My result are out yesterday, Praise to the Lord, i pass all my subject. Eventhough none of them got HD, at least they are all nearly distinction and credit. I'll do better this time. I want to do it as if i'm doing it for God.
I stop complaining and start counting my blessing. And i am so grateful for all the grace God has given me.

There are time i wish i had my family near me. It would be very comforting if i am with them. But i know this is just a matter of time and distance. This is my responsibility as a child. I want to make my parents be proud of me, as i am very proud of them. Love them strongly .:) <3

And i wish all the best to all my friends, my besties, you are all a blessing to me too. :)
treasure you all..
miss you all very much.

Last but not least, i'm planning to have a rest early tonight.
Arrange my clothes, which i washed yesterday. They are all dry i supposed, coz yesterday a bit gloomy, jadi baju sy x berapa kering. Today is a sunny day, so skrang msti sudah kering semua.

Until then, i wish i could update from time to time. It is still holiday, so probably i got plenty of time to update my beloved blog. :)
Good night people.
Give thanks everyday.
God bless you and keep you all always. :)
see ya..